Tag: Lifelong Learning

Teaching Conflict Management

Last year when we surveyed teachers on the topics they would like to look into as part of the Professional Development for the 2016-2017 school year, some of you chose to “write-in” a topic that you would like to learn more about.  One of the write-ins was:

“Problem solving social situations, especially with friends, recess, lunchtime, specials, etc.”

Learn Like a PirateWhile there are ways that we could probably take that idea and turn it into a PD Topic, I thought that I would give some tools that you might be able to use in the classroom the first time that you see a situation of conflict develop – my goal here is to provide you with a right now strategy.  I can’t claim this idea – the majority of this post is based on ideas from the book Learn Like a Pirate by Paul Salarz (@PaulSalarz).  Mr. Solarz is a fifth grade teacher in the Chicago area and runs a student-led classroom.  There are so many tips in the book to help guide students to collaborate, be empowered, and take leadership in their own learning.  I highly recommend it!!!  The following ideas come from the Teaching Strategies for Dealing with Conflict section on page 56.

In a classroom where you are integrating student voice and student choice and allowing opportunities for students to collaborate there will invariably be some type of disagreement.  We’ve all seen it happen – Tommy and Jeff partner up.  Everyone (including them) knows this is a bad idea.  One strategy would be to break them up before they even have a chance to start working.  However, in a collaborative community, everyone needs to learn how to work with everyone.  Not only will it help your classroom run more smoothly, it’s an important lifelong skill!

We all know what happens next…  If you allow them to work, before long there’s a disagreement.  Our reaction can make or break this situation.  Instead of saying that this is what you knew would happen, and separate them, what if you gave them the tools to find a solution on their own?  What an awesome opportunity to turn this situation into a teachable moment – not just for Tommy and Jeff, but for the whole class.  Here’s what you could do:

  1. Get the entire class’s attention – “Give me five!”, hands up, or whatever strategy you use in your classroom.
  2. With a sincere smile on your face, look at Tommy and Jeff and thank them for having a little bit of trouble because it gives you the opportunity to teach everyone how simple it can be to get through conflicts.
  3. Ask the boys to describe what happened, then teach the whole class the following strategies (you might even consider making an anchor chart for this skill to post in the room – or even better, have the students make the anchor chart!):

Lets settle thisRock-Paper-Scissors: Do you know how many arguments my friends and I have avoided with a simple game of rock-paper-scissors?  When your students can’t decide who gets what job, or what color the background should be on a poster, a single round of rock-paper-scissors can be just the perfect way to find a solution!

Compromise: Take a portion of each person’s idea and combine them together.  (“I want to watch the video clip first.” “But I think we need to plan our poster design.” “Why don’t we plan our poster design right after we watch the video!?”).  Hopefully they can find a solution that makes them both happy!

Choose Kind: Sometimes the best solution to conflict is just to do what the other person wants because it’s also a good idea!  As the quote from Dr. Wayne Dwyer goes: “When given a choice between being right and being kind, choose kind.”  Winning an argument while also hurting a classmate does not help the class win.  This summer I began using the phrase Choose Kind with my children (7 and 4 years old). It’s amazing to see how often they have been choosing kind to solve their disagreements.

The earlier you can teach these strategies to your class, the sooner they can begin to implement them.  Once students understand the process, these steps can be used even when you aren’t there – the lunch room, hallways, recess, etc.  If you don’t run into a conflict after a few days, then you might want to role play a scenario.  The sooner these strategies are introduced, the better!

As with any other strategy, we have to be ready to reinforce the use.  You can’t just introduce it once and then assume they all know it and will be successful.  Every time you notice a conflict, make sure students know you are aware (proximity, a concerned smile, etc.), but don’t just jump in and solve the problem.  Give them a little time to see if they will come to a resolution on their own.  For this strategy to truly be effective, the students have to come to use it on their own.

After you witness students come to a resolution, let them know how proud you are of how they handled it, and see if they would be willing to share their experience with the class.  If they are, have them act it out so the whole class can learn from the situation.  If students don’t want to share, that’s ok too!  They may be shy or embarrassed by what happened.

If students can’t get past the conflict on their own, then you might have to gently remind them of the conflict-management strategies to help them move on (this is where that anchor chart could be really handy!).  It’s also ok if another student steps in to help with finding a solution.  What a sign of good collaboration!

Continue the conversation in the comments below.  Could these strategies work in your room?  What else have you done that’s been successful?  Conflict can be such a distraction and sticking point that we can all use some good new ideas!

I don’t have time for that!

I don’t have time for that!

It’s a refrain that seems to come up quite often in education.  You might have just left a professional development talking with a colleague and you feel excited to try something that you learned only to hear “I don’t have time for that” in response.  Or maybe you shared an article with a friend that you have used to help in your classroom, and the only response you get is “I don’t have time for that.”

Or even worse, maybe you’re the one saying “I don’t have time for that” to your colleague, administrator, or friend.  My immediate response, knowing that we work primarily in a learning environment, is “You don’t have time to learn?”  Would you allow your students to say that?  Would that be an acceptable response in your classroom?

I would challenge you to shift your mindset.  Reading a recent post from the blog Principal of Change, George Couros makes a suggestion of what we can say instead of saying “I don’t have time for that.”

  1. How will my students benefit from this practice?
  2. I am not seeing the relevance of this for teaching and learning…could you give me specifics of how this would impact my practice?
  3. How would you suggest incorporating what you are suggesting into my position?
  4. What has been the biggest benefit for your own practice?
  5. If I was to do this, what would it replace that I am doing now?

Time

How many times have we all tried things, thinking that they wouldn’t be valuable, or we wouldn’t like them, only to realize a few days (or weeks, or months) into the new thing that we couldn’t imagine not doing things this way?

So what can we learn from those moments?  My hope is that we would come to the realization that it is important to be open to learning and trying new things.  Just because you feel as though you “don’t have the time” you can’t just dismiss something out of hand.  Take the moment to ask the questions above.  If the answers are satisfactory, then that should show that you need to make the time to learn a little more, to try it out, and hopefully create a better learning environment for our students.

Remember that we are the ultimate models of learning for our students.  If we never try something new, if we never exit our comfort zone, if we never do things differently than the way we’ve done something in the past, then we are saying to our students that it’s ok for them to be the same way.

What are some things you tried, not knowing quite how they would work out, only to be pleasantly surprised by how great it really was?  Let us know in the comments below!

Reflection & Growth

Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action.

At the end of every school year, one of my favorite things to do is to take some time to reflect on the year – what worked well?  What didn’t work so well?  What are the things I want to improve upon?  And conversely, what are the things I want to just forget ever happened?

As you are wrapping up your year, keep in mind that moments of reflection can be one of the most powerful pieces of the learning puzzle.  After you have finished cleaning your classroom, preparing for summer break, finishing student grades, and the multitude of other things that the end of the year will bring, take a little quiet time by yourself to just reflect.

You might choose to look back at your lesson plans from the year, you might look at samples of student work that you hung onto, or you might have another method that works for you to remind yourself of all that happened in your room during the last 180 student days.  Whatever method you choose, ask yourself some questions:

  • What are the things that happened this year that were awesome, and you can’t imagine not doing again?  How will you make sure not to forget by next year?
  • What are the things that you were excited about that maybe your students didn’t enjoy as much as you thought they would?  What could you add to get the students more excited about that topic? (If you’re looking for some ideas to hook your students into a lesson, check out Teach Like a Pirate by Dave Burgess – tons of great hooks that can build interest, excitement, and engagement)
  • What did you feel was the single most effective thing you did in your classroom this year?  What ideas can you take from that activity to make other activities more effective?

As you reflect, also take some time to think about things you wish to learn more about.  Make a list of those things that you wish to learn more about.  Write it down so you don’t forget.  If you’re anything like me, the first few days of summer break will be just that, a break.  At some point, you’ll get the itch to think a little more about the things that will help you grow as an educator.  At that time, go back to your list and use some of your free time to grow as an educator!

Many of us also love to have an accountability partner so that we don’t get to the end of the summer and feel like we didn’t accomplish any of the things we wanted to do.  Share the things that you are interested in with your colleagues at the beginning of summer – your teammate, your PLC, others with similar interests – and then reach out to them from time to time.  Share what you are learning, a great book you’re reading, a blog post you loved, or something else that fits with your topic.  For those of us on Twitter – use the hashtag #RSISummerLearning (clicking the link will take you directly to a search of that hashtag on Twitter) to share what you’re up to.  Even if you don’t post to Twitter, you can go to that search anytime to see what others may have shared.  The more we all share, the more we all can learn from one another!  Next August we’ll all be able to bring that learning back to school to support our students and do even more amazing things!

Most of all, enjoy your summer time!  I know that I’m looking forward to my summer for some relaxation, a Cubs game or two, time with family and friends, and time to do some of the things that I never seem to have time for during the school year.  Have a great summer!